Laura's Story
Laura's story isn't uncommon, for some people its easy to come out and for others there is an internal struggle, either way it is important to ...
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Continue to do what you have always done together. LGBT people often fear that coming out will change everything in their lives and this can be frightening. If you have always played football with your friend on Saturday, continue to do this. Your friend is still the same person as they where the previous Saturday!
Be a LGBT Ally. Challenge homophobic comments and attitudes and help to create LGBT friendly environments.
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If a friend tells you they’re gay, lesbian, transgender or bisexual don’t act as if this is wrong or strange. It’s not and you should accept their sexuality without prejudice.
How to Support an LGBT Friend
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Coming out is when someone tells someone else their sexual orientation or gender identity. Most of us are brought up to think that everyone is attracted to the opposite sex and that our gender identity will match our physical body (or the gender we were assigned at birth). For people who this is the case, they very rarely need to come out, as who they areattracted to matches what is seen as ‘normal’ and how they feel inside matches what society sees as being male or female. These people may not even consider themselves to have a sexual orientation or gender identity because it’s not labelled as ‘different’
Be conscious of the fact that many LGBT people live in environments which are homophobic and transphobic and in which they constantly hear negative messages about LGBT people. This can make people quite fearful of how people may react to them coming out and fearful of potential rejection by friends and family
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You could make it easier for friends to come out to you by making it clear to all your friends that you are positive and respectful about LGBT people. For example, if they have heard you challenge homophobic comments or talk comfortably about LGBT issues and people, this could help to reduce any anxiety they have about coming out to you.
If a friend comes out to you, remember that the person has not changed. They are still the same person you knew before; you just have more information about them than you did before. They are still the same friend they have always been.
The fact that they have come out to you shows that you are important to them and that they trust you. Thank them for their trust and reassure them of your continued friendship and support. This is important as they may have been afraid that you might have rejected them and that they would lose you as a friend. Be the friend you have always been.
Try not to react badly, even if you have strong feelings about LGBT issues. If you judge your friend, or express disapproval, you will do nothing to change your friend’s identity but you will hurt them and make them feel rejected and uncared for. It is also important to remember the potential impact rejection by friends and family can have on the mental health and well being of LGBT people.